Spoiled Ripe

Some may say that the men in my life spoil me rotten. I'd say they spoil me ripe, as I don't think I've quite gotten to the rotten stage. Yet.

So where did this come from? Well, we are experiencing a bit of snowfall and ice as my last posts laments. I reeeeally didn't want to drive to work today, and my brother certainly knows how I feel about driving in ice.

A couple of years ago I wrecked my Explorer Sport Trac on ice. I did $28,000 damage to a truck that was only worth $16,000. I would blame the other bastard for the accident except that whooopsie, I was the only one involved.

That takes talent.

Anyway, I am still a bit gun shy as it was not a pretty accident bouncing between guard rails. So my brother calls me up and says he'll take me to work and pick me up.

Waaa. It's that sweet?

So he comes to my house, and as he gets here the college guys that live next door are finishing shoveling my driveway. "You pay someone to shovel?" he asks me. "No, they just do it because they are nice."

My brother rolls his eyes and say, "You are sooooooo spoiled."

"Am not!" I say to the man that came to my house to drive me to work and is getting up at the butt crack off dawn to pick me up.

"Am too!" he tells me as I have a death grip on the grab handle in the headliner.

God I hate this slick shit.

So I think about this as I'm walking to my office. Am I really that spoiled and don't even know it?

I get to my office, and I start reading my email. I pull out my Yuppie Meal on wheels, and discover that I have a tangerine in my lunch.

Uck. I hate peeling citrus-y things because then your fingers smell all citrus-y.

The manager of our QC department knows this, so when he sees the tangerine, he comes over, peels it for me, and pulls the sections apart, all without me saying a word.

Ok, so maybe I'm a little bit spoiled.

I finish my lunch, and head down to the end of the line for start up. The incoming quality inspector comes by and brings me my cup of coffee, two splenda's, fat free cream of course.

Umm..yeah.

So all day I'm noting these random acts of spoilage. The repairman that brought me my fav bottled water. The stock guy that picked me up on his cart because he heard me get called to the other side of the plant on the radio. The inspector that brought me in some sugar free chocolate.

I wonder how long I've been spoiled like this, and I decide to share my thoughts with The Old Irish Bastard.

"Since birth," is his answer. "No I haven't," I say, and he tells me, as only he can, "There is a real thin line between being really naive and really fucking dumb. I don't think you are really fucking dumb, and I don't think you are really naive."

I heart this man.

Then I feel like I've been an ungrateful bitch. I mean, all these people spoiling me, and I haven't noticed? So The Old Irish Bastard, in is infinite wisdom, tells me, "But I bet you spoil them all back just as bad."

Ahhh. Now this is true. I do love spoiling people, and I do it with great frequency.

So I'm spoiled ripe, and I love every minute of it. I also spoil other people ripe, and I think I love that even more.