Friday, November 19, 2004

Mommy Bloggers Beware

There are an awful lot of Mommy Bloggers out there, and they actually call themselves that. "Mommy"

Mommy did this and Mommy did that. Mommy cleaned up the poop and Mommy made dinner.

I would like to tell all of you "Mommies" out there a cautionary tale of intrigued, shock, and pure embarrassment.

My sis-in-law, or sil from now on because I'm lazy, is 36. She still calls her Mom "Mommy."

Yes. Take that in. Think about it. Think about your child calling you that in public once they are old enough to live on their own.

The first time I heard her do it was right before she married my brother. She was on the phone, and she said, "I love you Mommy."

Oh she didn't just call her Mommy, did she?

Well I figured it was a fluke, or she was feeling sentimental with the wedding and all. She probably didn't think anyone heard her.

Then during a fitting for bridesmaids dresses she did it again. In like public. In front of people.

I told my Mom what happened. She was like, "She did not." I assured her she did.

Now just plain Mommy would be bad enough. She says it how a two year old says it. Mooommiiiieeee.

Yes. Moommiiiieeeee.


Over the years I have enjoyed the shock of others when she is with her Mom and she calls her Moommiiiieeee.

She also encourages her children to call her Mooommiiiieeee, and she almost gets depressed when they call her Mom.

She is one twisted chick, let me tell ya.

I call my mom "Ma" usually, or if I'm in a sarcastic mood "Mother" because she absolutely HATES that. Sometimes I'll call her Mooommiiiieeee, but it is for pure sarcastic laugh at my sil's expense kind of deal.

It's a head turner in public, let me tell you. I have seen some of the most priceless looks ever while hiding behind other people, under the table, anywhere so it didn't look like I was with her.

The most common look is the "What the fuck did she just say" look. A close second is the "What the fuck is wrong with her" look.

I'm sure some of you Moooommmmiiiiieeee's out there are thinking that it wouldn't be so bad. It might even be kind of special if your child called you that their whole life.

It is, and it's not. Trust me. You do not want to be 90 some day and have a 65 year old saying "Moooommiiieee." Cease and desist with the Mommy stuff before it is too late!

22 comments:

The Mad Tech said...

Priceless. If I said that to my Mother at the ripe old age of 33, I think she would break out the wooden spoon and whup my ass.

BTW, 75 and sunny in Phoenix today. But I would kill for Portillio's.

The Mad Tech

Rich Rosenthal II said...

Spread the word accross the land! heh. Kim at Relaxed Homeskool pointed out a genuine daddy blog to me and mentioned that their is such a thing as a baby blog. be afraid. Cutsie wutsie made a poopsie. Please no.

Funkalicious said...

That is freaking scary. Omg.

Buster Van Buren said...

Just a thought here...Is she (or her mother - which I guess would make her...duh) Hispanic? Most Latin kids call their moms, Mami (which is pronounced Mommie) - including myself and just about every other Cuban, Puerto Rican, Spanish and Mexican kid I've ever met. My wife was shocked too the first time she heard me call her that. Once I explained it though, she calls her Mami as well. I guess you whitey's will never understand....Signed, Mami's boy.

kj4ever said...

There is a big difference between Mami and Moooommmmiiiiieeeee.

My sil is caucassion, so that's not why..

Strawberrie-Shortcake said...

I can soooo relate! Ha ha ha ..not that I ever knew there was anything too funny about it till I saw it from another persons point of view. My grandparents have 10 kids (including my own mommy) who still call ma and pa ...you guessed it ...mommy and daddy. I think a lot of country people do. ...My daughter calls my mom "Grandmommy" ...probably always will.

rancette said...

i was 7 years old, maybe even younger. When I said "Mommy", my mom said "Never call me that. You aren't a baby any more." Sometimes it's nice to have a Mommy. But Mooooommieeeeee is a little bit much, I'll say that.

princessr9 said...

I have never called my mother mommy, or mooommiiiieeee either for that matter. I've always just called her mom, and my own kids that are 3 & 4 don't cally me mommy, they call me mom or momma. It's just not something we do. I never told them not to call me mommy, they just don't. I would never refer to myself as mommy either. Yuck!

Pink Poppy said...

Okay, I haven't called my mother "Mommy" since I was 7 or 8. However, I call my father "Daddy" about 90% of the time. Actually, I think I only call him "Dad" if I'm really angry or put out with him (and yes, that's the case...oh...at least 10% of the time).

It's a cultural thing in the South. I don't know why it's only true with father's, but I don't know a Southern woman who has a decent relationship with her father and doesn't call him "Daddy". Weird. I know. But it's true. So thump me now. (OUCH! I was kidding...ouch!)

kj4ever said...

Poppy, Daddy is perfectly acceptable if spoken with a southern accent and not pronounced as a two year old would pronounce it.

I don't think I know anyone from the south that doesn't call their Dad Daddy.

kj4ever said...

Oh, and Mad Tech, the visual of a 30 something getting their ass beat with a wooden spoon about made me spit coffee all over my monitor...Priceless...

Anonymous said...

My 5 year old called me Dude.

~Genuine


www.genuineblog.com

Anonymous said...

FREAKY! my sil does the exact same thing. also, my mom and i share the same laugh at her expense.

i fear for my neices.

jesse
ipsoblogo.com

Anonymous said...

Heya. I found your through BE. :)

I so hear ya on the Mommy thing. My sister tried to call our mom Mommy once while in our 20's and my mom responded by giving her the evil eye. And there are definitely tons of Something-Mommy-Something blogs out there. But then who am I to complain? I've got Bunny in the name of my blog! lol

Anyways. You're fabulous! I will be back. :)
groovebunny

Annie said...

I have a cousin who is on his second wife. His first wife was a mess and he remarried and his second wife became a real mother to his kids. The kids call wife #1 (their biological mother) mother. They call wife #2 (the woman actually raising them) mommy.

I'm sure it will be shortened to mom when they get older but it drives MOTHER nuts.

Anonymous said...

That's how Reagan referred to Nancy, for what it's worth (now all the right wingers will think it's poetry, I guess). --Gus Openshaw

kj4ever said...

Oh Mr. Openshaw, GTMA...

The original title for this post was "What Do My SIL and Ronald Reagan Have in Common"

It was to long and looked stupid, and I figured people might not "get it". It's that whole selling out deal rearing it's ugly head...

ladydaria said...

Former fiance' was 49 and his MOTHER insisted he call her MOMMY. How strange is that? Anyway, she was overbearing and a control-freak so I got out of the engagement so MOMMY could keep her BABY! Great post!

MR Hester said...

Like Poppy, I'm a Southern Gal and call my male parental unit Daddy, but my mom is my mom and sometimes she's Mrs. Smith. She has taught school for 30 yrs and doesn't always respond to mom so we say Mrs. Smith and it gets her attention everytime.

kj4ever said...

Dariana, if you look up "red flag" in the dictionary I believe the post you just wrote is the definition.

My GOD...

kj4ever said...

and for the record, to anyone who may have emailed me defending Mommy Blogs...

I was not ripping on Mommy Blogs. Being a MOM is the most important thing in the world. It was just a cautionary tale about how once the kids pass, oh 2 or 3 they may want to rename their blogs MOM.

Jenny said...

I'm a very proud MOM. My 4 year old will occasionally call me mommy when he is sick or REALLY wanting something, but for the most part I think I would have to snatch them bald if they called me moooommmiieeee in public. It seems a bit ummm, scary.

However, I'm not offended by blogs that I are titled Mommy. I feel that it's just a word used to describe a place in life, not necessarily a promise of extreme weirdness.

Great blog you have here. BE rocks my socks.