Wednesday, November 24, 2004

Mid Life Crisis

I certainly hope this isn't a mid-life crisis, seeing how I am only going to be 34 on December 19th.

34. Thirty four. Thiiirty Fooour.

I do not like the sound of 34.

It is the first age to bother me, even a little bit.

34.

I think it all started when my wonderful ex called me to give me shit about my birthday. "I'm still in my early thirties," I told him. "No your not, you'll be in your mid-30's," he reminded me.

Shit. The bastard is right.

Thirty didn't bother me one bit. I think it was because I was drunk most of the month of December that year.

Since then I haven't really thought about it. I mean, I'm genetically lucky and all. I don't have wrinkles. I don't even have fine lines. My face looks 22, and I still get carded.

So why should the whole 34 business be gnawing at the back of my sub-conscious?

I think I forget that I'm in my 30's. It certainly doesn't seem like I should be in my 30's. I don't look like it, act like it, or feel like it.

Part of my problem is I ran into a couple of people that graduated high school with me the other day. Damn did they look old. I looked in the bathroom mirror about 5 times that day to make sure that no crow's feet had planted themselves on my face.

They were totally tan though. Considering they were total idiots in high school, the leather like appearance of their skin told the tale that they had become a couple of idiot adults.

Damn you 34!

In unrelated news, I had to train someone today that talks like a baby. She said "Potty" at least four times.

These people creep.me.out.

She also called herself "Mommy." I asked how old her kids were. 14 and 17.

For the Love of God, will it ever end?

10 comments:

Rich Rosenthal II said...

Potty and Mommy? Is this an adult re entering the work force? Does she listen to Roe Conn on WLS as he always talks about having to go "Big Potty." People deliberately seem to keep themselve ingorant make me cringe.

MR Hester said...

Was that mommy or moommmmiiiiie

kj4ever said...

Rich, she's worked there for 20 years. I must be a "Mommy" magnet or sumfin.

It was just a plain old "Mommy" Hester, thank God.

Anonymous said...

I'd love to hear the sound of 34 again!! Wait til you have to say that you're 51 :(. I hate how that sounds lol.

Charlotte
http://uncommonthoughts.blogdrive.com

Anonymous said...

I'll be 24 on 12/18. In a world where only 2-3 years ago people my age were expected to be internet millionaires, i find it very difficult to reach my mid-20's without being a bang up success. Personally, I wish the world weren't so concerned with age as with accomplishment. Happy birthday early!

--saint kellen

Annie said...

I'm 34 too. But I don't feel or look my age. I like my 30's much better than my 20's. Someone said 50 is the new 30 - so that gives a few years! :)

Penny said...

I just turned 32. You know what makes you feel better? Sleeping with a first year University student's 19 year old younger brother. You can let your age slip when he asks you, "duuude, howdyou get so good at that?" LOL ;)

kj4ever said...

Oh don't get me wrong Annie. I wouldn't go back to my 20's for all the money in the world.

Well, ok, maybe for all the money in the world, but not for say, a million dollars.

The 30's have been waaay better. I'm just not liking the mid-thirty title I think.

Anonymous said...

I just turned 29 recently and I was all freaked out because now I only have one more year of my 20s. And then, the big 3-0. I hate aging and have decided to stop having birthdays now. 29 forever! Sarah

flyrchld said...

I just turned 34, it's no big deal. I too get carded on a regular basis, even at movies! You have to be like, what?, 17 or something? And I go to movies a lot! I avoid it now by buying my tickets at the automated tellers.
You crack me up! You and I could be sisters, except for the diabetic part. I have a hellacious sugar tooth, does that count?